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Guilt

Posted by Diane on 10/31/2024, 3:47 am

I keep going over if I should have done something different. I'll have to see what he had with the ultopsy because of Max. I have to make sure Dorian didn't have a contagious disease that Max might have.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Seesthru, TC advisor on 11/2/2024, 4:56 pm, in reply to "Guilt"

I think you did all you could do. There's no need to feel guilty, though we all do when our little ones pass on.

Your decisions were to get him looked after, and then the vet said he wouldn't make it and would suffer, you made the only choice you could make. Poor little Dorian, I wish he could have been with yo a while longer, but I believe it was his time.

Please try not to feel guilty. You made the choices I think any of us would make in the same circumstances, because you love Dorian.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Diane on 11/2/2024, 5:40 pm, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

He was never quite rite since I got him. His poop was always watery and then whe he had the tilted head. The doctors never really gave me a diagnosis. The move was strenuous on both of them. I never grabbed them or kept them in a cage u til I was selling my coop. They both don’t like this apartment. I really want to see the autopsy. If he did have a heart condition or cancer I wouldn’t have treated him for that anyway. Everything was so sudden. The bird was grasping to. Bread. I have to keep reminding myself I did the humane thing. I hope. I don’t know why I still believe in miracles.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Seesthru, TC advisor on 11/3/2024, 6:21 pm, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

When I took Chloe in and she was so sick, the vet said she was too sick, and I had to have her euthanized. Her illness was so sudden, too. I felt bad after, and I missed her so much. But I knew , seeing her gasp, she was too far gone too fast.

I think that's how it was with Your little guy.

I know mine aren't as active in the new place. Lately, I don't have as much time to spend with them. I still sleep in their room, or rather our room. I probably always will. They liked the other place better. It was all they knew.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Diane on 11/3/2024, 6:54 pm, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

There's another part I didn't mention. The vet said that if they treat her aggressively the estimated cost would be 21,000. for a two week stay at the hospital. And she said they did that treatment on another bird and that bird wasn't doing well. Yes that is the amount they quoted me. I was In shock. I don't think I asked enough questions and the ones I asked she wouldn't really give me answers to. She did say that it was the humane thing to do. because he was having such a hard time breathing. But she did say there was no right or wrong response. I guess that's why I feel so much rage. I just don't have 21,000. to try.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Diane on 11/4/2024, 4:23 am, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

I wish I asked more questions. I was just not thinking straight and my hearing is so bad. Maybe I misunderstood the 21K. I can't believe this.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Seesthru, TC advisor on 11/4/2024, 3:57 pm, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

Healthcare including in hospital stays for pets, and treatment, can run into the thousands. You might not be wrong about the amount. Also, in my experience tiels, smaller birds, just do not handle aggressive treatments well at all. If it involved sedation, chances are he would not have survived. Strong medications, same result.

No one i know has that kind of money to spend on treatment that will likely not result in anything but prolonged suffering for the little one. In my heart of hearts, I think you did the right thing.
I know you feel guilty, but I hope one day, you can realize, you freed his spirit from a suffering, dying body.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Diane on 11/4/2024, 4:39 pm, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

Thank you very much. I go through periods of feeling normal and than crazy. Deep down I knew this was going to happen. What gets me scared more than anything is that vet care has gotten so expensive that people will stop adopting animals that need a home.

Re: Guilt

Posted by Cathy on 11/7/2024, 11:27 am, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

You'll be up and down for a while, Diane. It's a process. I agree 100% with what seesthru said. And it's not just that vet care has become so expensive. In my area the number of 1) avian vets across the board has considerably dwindled and 2) the number of avian vets within a single practice has also dwindled. That made it difficult to have a main vet for Shiloh.

Cathy

Re: Guilt

Posted by Diane on 11/8/2024, 5:53 pm, in reply to "Re: Guilt"

I am going up and down constantly. I miss Dorian so much. I feel so bad for Max. He looks so scared constantly. I'll keep doing what I'm doing and staying with him at least 9 hours a day. I'm lucky I'm working at home.

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