ST. LOUIS (WE) - The Wrestling Eyeball learned this evening from AWE "promotor" Bill Gargle that low-rung PWL talent Tower Climbin' Jackass has signed an exclusive deal with Gargle's AWE outfit.

Boasting of this move, Gargle rambled for over two minutes in a phone message left in the Eyeball's storage room behind the hot water pipes, more than once interrupted by a woman on Gargle's end of the line informing him that his phone privileges had, in fact, been revoked earlier in the week, apparently a punishment for breaking one of the garage windows.

"Yeah, this is, like, a totally major signage, boys!" Gargle was heard to bray in his phone message. The overheard woman, believed to be Mrs. Selma Gargle, objected to her son's further words, "When you hear what else we've signed, man, you'll be f---ing floored!"

Additionally, Bill Gargle implied he would sue WWE chairman Vince McMahon due to the supposed similarities between the name "Bill Gargle" and the name of onetime WWWF heavyweight champion Superstar Billy Graham. Gargle also claimed he was in talks to resign Fluffy to a new deal.

The Eyeball did not attempt to reach anybody for comment on this story.

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Copyright 2004 Wrestling Eyeball Magazine.