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    Disaster! Archived Message

    Posted by PhilRobbie on 19/6/2021, 7:17 pm

    As some of you know, I have employed a ‘trophy’ signing to the firm of Cartier Industries to keep my staff in check.
    The gentleman in question quite correctly wants to remain anonymous due to his Stockport related ‘incidents’ in a past life….swinging from the crossbar whilst the game was I progress at a Devon based football club spring to mind.
    I was as excited as anyone as I imagined The Dingler cowering in a corner as my latest signing was on the verge of giving him a damn good hiding.
    Hampton was on the verge of tears when I mentioned who his new boss was and Oaf almost dropped his Steak Bake at the news.
    Spangle seemed to take it all in his stride but deep down he too was probably close to soiling his Farrahs.
    I called a meeting in the bin shed last night and smiling, retired to my rooms to celebrate.
    An hour later I popped my head around the bin shed door expecting to be met with a bit of respect for once.
    I couldn’t be more wrong!
    Lurc…ahem….mr anonymous has completely taken their side!
    The tirade of bad language strewn insults aimed at me was was frankly disgusting….even Hampton joined in!!!
    It’s all gone horribly wrong with Lurch commendering my rooms leaving me to doss with the plebs in the bin shed.
    I instantly began berating the easy target that is Hampton but he piped up with his weedy voice “Leave me alone or I’ll tell Lurch”.
    What little respect I had has now crumbled like a white dog turd and Lurch has taken over.
    He’s currently necking my excellent collection of malt whiskies mixed together in a pint pot while I’m trying and failing to extort money from the staff so I can escape the hell-hole of the bin shed.
    The other four idiots are openly amused by these events!
    Any advice would be welcome!


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