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Just venting

Posted by MS Director on 4/22/2025, 8:36 am

I had a student whose parents REFUSED to allow attend after school rehearsals leading up to UIL because band was an "extracurricular" and other academic classes needed to be the priority of what she chose to work on. The parents were worried that band took up too much time and her grades were suffering due to the 1-hour rehearsal once per week.

Fast forward to now:

The parents have decided to take the family on an extended break -- she will miss about 5 days of school -- so that they can go on a European family vacation. My student? Is currently failing 2 classes (not band). Seems like a legit way to reward your kid for failing grades and time management, right?

Re: Just venting

Posted by 1A HBD on 4/24/2025, 10:37 am, in reply to "Just venting"

Why are we stressing out about this?

If you have a policy in place about after school rehearsals and grades just follow your policy and move on.

The student is taking a trip to Europe with their family, getting upset about it is not going to change their trip. They are going whether you are upset about it or not. It may seem that the family is being hypocritical but that is above our paygrade to worry about.

Teach the students who are there. When this student returns, teach them every day they are there.

Is it fair that the student is doing this, probably not. Is getting worked up or stressed about it going to fix it, probably not.

Fix what you can fix. Control what you can control. Everything else, just roll with it and make the best out of it. It is just band.

Re: Just venting

Posted by Hope on 4/26/2025, 5:54 am, in reply to "Re: Just venting"

This is the answer.

Best wishes

Re: Just venting

Posted by Me on 4/22/2025, 4:58 pm, in reply to "Just venting"

In the future dock their grade. After school practices can be graded. Students just can not fail SOLEY due to after school events. But if they tend to not go to sectionals, then they tend to not pass their other assignments and you can justify failing them. Just from the sounds of it, be sure to dot your T's and cross your I's.

Re: Just venting

Posted by Careful on 4/24/2025, 7:45 am, in reply to "Re: Just venting"

I know with my school we had to have alternate assignments because we weren't allowed to have grades rely on hours outside of regular school days.

Re: Just venting

Posted by Me on 4/24/2025, 10:09 am, in reply to "Re: Just venting"

True, though the answer to that is if they don't want to do after school stuff remove them from the program. At the very least, you make the alternative assignment so unbearable that it is easier to just go to the after school stuff.

Re: Just venting

Posted by Perspective on 4/22/2025, 3:19 pm, in reply to "Just venting"

You're looking at this the wrong way. This isn't about the kid...it's about what THEY want. THEY want to go to Europe now...not wait until school's out...they want to go NOW.

Is the kid in athletics? If so, did they tell Coach that the kid can't stay for after/before school practice?

Out of curiosity, how long are they going to be there? If the kid is only missing 5 days, they can't be going over there for very long; going for less than 14 days really isn't getting your money's worth...zipping through things without really taking in the experience.

Yep, like someone else stated...high maintenance parents.

Re: Just venting

Posted by band on 4/22/2025, 2:47 pm, in reply to "Just venting"

Been there. Also, you can't forget the parents that schedule major dental procedures in the weeks leading up to UIL despite multiple communications throughout the year asking them to avoid those in specific months.

Re: Just venting

Posted by MS on 4/22/2025, 1:08 pm, in reply to "Just venting"

Sounds like you work in one those "high maintenance parents" districts.

Every place has its own drawbacks

Re: Just venting

Posted by Warhawk on 4/22/2025, 11:54 am, in reply to "Just venting"

Then you have those families who take a cruise the week you come back from Christmas break and want you to give them their assignments so they can work on them..

Re: Just venting

Posted by Nimble Brain on 4/22/2025, 10:23 am, in reply to "Just venting"

Two Words: Mental Gymnastics

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