When enough is enough? I’m coming up on 20 years soon, and in all that time I feel like I’ve accomplished nothing. I’ve made 1 first division on stage. I am forever getting “you’re doing all the right things” and “so much progress” and yet time after time after time I fall short.
I’ve had mentors, clinicians, been to workshops, filmed and evaluated my teaching, everything. I just don’t know if I’m supposed to keep doing this. I’ve had success in marching, but I cannot for the life of me figure out the concert problem. It’s just really hitting me hard this time.
So how do you know when you’re just not cut out for the job?
Re: How do you know
Posted by It's not you, it's... on 3/31/2024, 11:34 pm, in reply to "How do you know"
20 years is a long time...
What's the situation like where you are? There are some places that it's just incredibly difficult to make that Div 1.
You mentioned marching so I'll assume you're at high school. How's your feeder situation? Is the MS consistently scoring well, and do the kids arrive at HS prepared for HS level literature?
How's your scheduling? Do you get kids in the right classes, at least most of the time?
How's the support from your administration and the community? Are your kids in your class more often than not, or are they constantly pulled for STAAR remediation? Does your admin leave you time to prepare, or are you constantly told to get the marching horns back out for another pep rally or sendoff for sports?
If you're not set up for success, it's time to start advocating for some change, or look at moving schools.
But since you asked, let's talk about you.
Are you a good musician? Honestly, some people just aren't cut out for it, and that's OK.
How was your training? Did you go to a good music college? Do you know enough about instrumental pedagogy? Do you understand the "sound" that UIL judges want to hear? If you don't have that baseline, it's hard to fix at this point in your career. Could you do a master's? Maybe a summer program in conducting?
Do you continue to play somewhere to keep your ears fresh? It's not an absolute requirement, but playing frequently with a quality community band gives me a lot of insight into what I'm trying to accomplish, and watching the conductor gives me some ideas of what I should (or should not) be doing on the podium.
Did you have some time working as an assistant to learn on the job, or jump right into a head/only director role? A mentor who comes out a few times a year is great, but the daily reinforcement of a strong head director is better. If you never had that opportunity, maybe you should see if there's an opening somewhere.
But really...that Div 1 trophy isn't the be-all-end-all. Do your kids sound good? Are they having a good time in band? Are the kids, parents, administration, larger community happy with what you're doing? Aside from the trophy or lack of, are you enjoying what you do every day? Trophies and ratings are not the only way to measure success.
Re: How do you know
Posted by Me on 3/30/2024, 9:47 pm, in reply to "How do you know"
What part of Texas are you in? I would love to come by and help if you are in my area. I am in the Houston area. If you respond to this, I will post an email and we can get in contact.
Re: How do you know
Posted by food for thought on 3/30/2024, 12:46 pm, in reply to "How do you know"
This is a highly individual decision, of course. I knew a director who consistently led his band to 3s in both marching and concert. He left the field for a few years but returned at a different school district where he led that band to consistent 3s until he retired.
There are school districts who will employ teachers at this level either because they don't care or don't believe they have the budget to recruit and retain better talent.
It sounds like your program is a lot better than this, but as you say, it is hitting you hard. I think you could benefit from more general career counseling that looks at not just when is it time to leave the band hall but when is it time to leave any career?
A key consideration for me would be what would you move on to.
You might be happier in a job where your performance appraisal is mostly a private matter between you and your manager and not leaked to the entire community via contest ratings. No shame in that. It is how most professionals' performance appraisal is handled.
Re: How do you know
Posted by Jake on 3/30/2024, 12:24 pm, in reply to "How do you know"
I you are a one man show, you need to get more ears hearing your rehearsals. If you can't get with listening in the band hall, tape your band and solicit the ears of other band directors. I went through a period of time when I couldn't get consistent ones on stage. When I finally got an assistant the results improved right off the bat. You just need some help that is there day after day. If you are making consistent 2s you are doing a lot of things right. It's the polishing you need help with. If you enjoy teaching and if your kids enjoy being in your band that means a lot. You just have ten more years before retirement. For my two cents worth, hang in there and keep on keeping on.
Re: How do you know
Posted by Racecar on 3/30/2024, 12:14 pm, in reply to "How do you know"
I am in a similar place. I want to point at the rubric and judge comments and ask for a specific breakdown on each item, possibly on a five point scale. I would like to see the receipts of their opinion, laid out numerically and calculated against a range to determine the rating. I would like to see that for each piece so that it is incredibly clear where the problems exist. I would prefer this over written comments. This is probably a huge ask to our judges and colleagues, but I do not feel that it is transparent enough. Near impossible to accomplish, but man would it would put to bed some lingering feelings and thoughts.