Re: The Price is Success
Posted by Thunder on 11/7/2022, 11:04 am, in reply to "The Price is Success"
4A head director here, 12 years in. |
I completely understand where you're coming from. I've had to work hard to find the balance for me, a husband and a father of a 6 year old.
Early on in my career I had an improper priority list. I put my job as a director on par with my job as a husband. So much so that when my wife asked me "What would you do if I went into labor on the day of UIL?" and my response was "I'll get there when contest is over" was exactly the WRONG response, and I don't say that because she got mad, but because at no point should my job take that level of precedence.
Now that my son is 6 and I have evaluated and re-organized my priority list, I'm come down to the following.
1. My faith
2. My family
3. Everything else.
I may never be competitive at the state marching contest, I may never make honor band, I may never have 20 kids in the all-state band. But at the end of the day my son is not going to remember where my band placed at the state contest, he won't remember the band making honor band, he won't remember how many kids made the all state band. He will remember, however, me coming to his baseball games, his soccer games, and taking him camping with the boy scouts.
As much as I love my kids as family, at the end of the day my wife and son will be beside me when I die, not them. My students are important, but not more important than my wife and son.
I keep that in mind when I make my decisions on how much time I demand of myself and my students and scheduling rehearsals. If I leave home before my son gets up and don't get home until after he goes to bed (as it was with my father being a restaurant owner when I was growing up) then I am not doing my job as a father that I believe my faith teaches me to do.
But to summarize: a state title or a bunch of kids in the all state band don't mean more to me than being there for my wife and son.