Re: Not sure I have or can force myself to have the correct personality for this job
Posted by BD on 2/6/2020, 8:56 am, in reply to "Not sure I have or can force myself to have the correct personality for this job"
Firstly, there is a balance that must be struck. You have to find a way to teach that works with your personality. If you are up there and are "inauthentic" or putting on too much of a show, the kids will see right through that and go for the throat. |
But you also have to be guarded. You cannot go up there and be completely authentic because teaching is a performance to a certain extent. Respect is a hard thing and I have been where you are. I bounced around several schools because I could not command the respect of the students.
This sounds silly, but true, you have to believe in yourself first. If you show hesitation or self doubt, the students will walk all over you.
I really have been where you are. If you want to discuss this more, I'd be happy to. Let me know if you want to discuss and I will post an e-mail address you can contact me at.
They always say “fake it till you make it” and for years I tried that. But I am not, nor can I seem to conjure up the forceful personality that is needed to deal with this career. Every other teacher I look at has this drive or empathy or baseline aura about them that commands respect from their students, and I can’t figure out how to emulate that. I’m either a doormat because my natural personality is very much non-confrontational, or a complete joke to the students when I do put on my “teacher face”. There is no balance to be struck and I’ve tried everything I can think of.
It’s started to make me resent this career and my personality and regret ever choosing this path but I’ve already blown money on this degree so there’s nothing to do about it. It’s getting to the point where even if there was some hidden way to “fix” myself I wouldn’t consider it worth it because then I’m just a completely different person every single day at work.
Not even sure why I posted this, mostly just venting more than anything. Depression sucks.