You can’t change other staff member’s work ethic. So…your only viable option is to find a place that matches your energy in order to work well together or obtain a head director position so you can hire within your level of work ethic.
I was a head director for 31 years and I hope my staff through those years felt I was doing my job by being present in all levels of our program. I was never an assistant. Not proud of that…it’s just how my career developed. I learned a lot of things the hard way because of my path.
I support your concern and appreciate the ability to search for answers and to vent your frustration. Hopefully you will eventually find a like minded staff.