(1) Your situation is not unique. Many band directors experience/have experienced these types of issues in their first and even second job. Make the best of it (sounds like maybe you have) and move on.

(2) Find a mentor. That person will help you with pedagogical issues as well as this other situation. A mentor can be obtained (at no cost) through the international bandmasters fraternity Phi Beta Mu. Feel free to contact me and I will put you in touch with someone who can make that happen for you.

(3) Young people are resilient. They will be fine. You must take care of yourself and family.

(4) Draw some boundaries. Do not let this job (or any other) consume you.

Best of luck, Steve Shoop- stephen_shoop@yahoo.com