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Posted by janny on 3/21/2008, 2:18 pm, in reply to "Need advice please"
149.99.159.210
Hi Kitty,
I was diagnosed with brain mets feb 14 this year. I wish i had had the wisdowm to withdraw and take the time i needed to process such disappointing and life altering news. Instead I continued in my normal role and ended up feeling very depressed trying to buoy up everyone around me. I really regret not taking the time.
On the other hand... I think I need people to be slightly more proactive. I really hate to ask for the same thing once, much less twice. So when your friend does contact you try and listen very very carefully to what she is asking for and then just do it.
Sort through your own emotions as best you can and let your friend take the lead in the direction your conversation takes. One friend of mine initiated discussion of my recurrence EVERY single time I saw her... a major downer. I'm taking time out from this person. Zero contact.
Love is the answer Kitty... lots of love and attunement are the most important things. dont worry about making mistakes... just try not to make them again and again and again.
The voice of experience, LOL Janny
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