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Posted by Anne on 8/29/2007, 11:00 am, in reply to "Marriage after BC"
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Oh! my dear Pattie - - what a terrible shock you have had. Please don't read anything into this that you do not know for sure. You know that if he said "in sickness and in health" and "for better or for worse" and can not live up to that, that is his problem. You have enough to deal with just with Stage IV alone. I know I have heard that sickness is one of the hardest things for marriages to survive. I am so fortunate to have a supportive husband in my illness. He gets pouty now and then, but when I call him on it, I have heard things like "did you think it might be what is going on?" There are so many ways that he cannot fix this for me. It frustrates him. My daughter had complications from a liver transplant and had an anoxic brain injury. Her husband is only 33, but for these last three years, and seemingly for the duration, he has stuck by her in a nursing home, bringing her home when he can, and helping her to be all she can be. She did not even know she was married for over a year after the event. But he shows such love; and she shows it back. Perhaps talking to your onc about her observation and comment would help you. This illness you are dealing with is a very hard thing. Please be careful to take care of yourself and not try to carry others who need to carry themselves. He may see that he has made a mistake and if you can leave that door open, wonderful.Forgiveness is a powerful thing. He may not, and you will need to still take care of yourself. Vent here whenever you need to.
Thinking of you. . . .Praying for the situation
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