[ Post a Response | Surgery / Reconstruction Board ]
Posted by Mirene on 2/27/2013, 10:24 amUser logged in as post
I found out I had breast cancer in July. Had a bilateral mastectomy with diep flap. Since then, had nipple reconstruction. Going to have my tattoos soon. Everything is going well, no chemo or radiation needed. Why do I feel so sad and angry. I always feel like I should be thankful, but always have these feelings of why did this happen, feel sad a lot. My husband is wonderful, but I take my anger out on him. And will say things I don't mean. Especially after sex. I tell him that he's avoiding my breasts, that he must be rupulsed my them. Nothing could be further from the truth, so why do I do that. I'm not the same person I was a year ago. I'm angry that I don't have feeling in my breasts. The sensation in my breasts was a big part of sex for me with my husband. I hate that instead of being happy that I'm cancer free, I have these thoughts. I hate when women that have never gone through any of this, tell me oh...if it were me, I would have no problem taking those breasts off and not even doing reconstruction. That makes me so angry. Then go ahead and do it. It's easy to say those things when you actually don't have to do it! I'm happy I'm alive and have no complications to date. Why am I so angry?