Posted by Mark on August 31, 2009, 20:29:12
75.162.5.66
The Great Minnesota Get-Together of 2009 was a decidedly mixed bag. The good news: I continued my streak of breaking the previous year's record in number of sightings. Last year's 192 was bested by this year's 206 sightings. I finally crashed the double-century threshold, even though it almost killed me getting there. My mom insisted on getting to the grounds even earlier than usual, so we arrived about 45 minutes earlier ahead of schedule. The additional morning time on my feet took its toll worse than usual by the time the late evening hours rolled around, leaving me hobbling around the grounds like a one-legged pirate for the last couple hours of the night. So my 206 sightings came with an hour more fair time than usual, but since that first hour was as marginal as usual, I would have broken the record anyway.
Now for the bad news....the sightings were the definition of bland for long stretches of the day. Clearly I've been spoiled by my last three visits to the Minnesota State Fair, which were my three best sightings days of all time. I scored SEVEN epic sightings on those three visits and scores of blockbusters. In 2009, there were zero epics, only a couple bona fide blockbusters, and a litany of frustrating missed opportunities. I would have preferred 106 sightings with genuinely memorable sightings moments than 206 sightings with only a handful worth getting excited about.
Also defining the "mixed bag" day was the weather. It was very cool in the morning and the forecast was sketchy and indeterminant. My worst fears didn't play out, but things got miserable mid-afternoon and stayed that way. Until about 2:30 the bright sunshine made the cool conditions tolerable and downright comfortable. I was relieved to see a fair amount of tanktops and shorts on the female fairgoers despite the cool conditions. But the clouds came in and the wind picked up mid-afternoon and suddenly that 63-degree weather felt alot more real. Around 6 p.m. it was really starting to feel cold and I felt sorry for the shivering tanktop and shorts girls. Attendance was nonetheless strong but it was either my worst or second-worst weather day in my 24 visits to the Minnesota State Fair.
Anyway, let's get onto the sightings....
As I said, we got there at 8:45 a.m., the time when the only smokers on the grounds are typically the parents and grandparents of families visiting. Some years these morning hours can be absolutely useless for sightings, but I did have my first memorable sighting of the day during the first half hour near the food building. Sighting #3 started out with my observing a rugged-looking 40ish couple both wielding cigarettes, but then I took note of the kids with them, including a 16ish brunette daughter. She had a somewhat alternative look with a lip ring (normally a total turnoff for me) but she was nonetheless cute with long dark hair flowing down her back. Lo and behold, she was carrying on the family tradition of smoking, publicly dragging from her cigarette in the early morning hours before crushing it out beneath her feet, which I would detect in passing was a Newport. Not a common cigarette brand here in the Midwest, so it was a joy to see a girl her age settling for only the highest nicotine and tar content in her smoke.
The sightings trickled in for the morning and the next one to impress was Sighting #7, a pretty girl that appeared to be of mixed Asian and white race sitting near the front gate smoking while waiting for a friend to leave the bathroom. She was very attractive and looked about 18 or 19 as she smoked her cork filter, and I found myself curious about her ethnic heritage as her features were only mildly Asian but she was clearly not 100% caucasian.
I think I stalled out at eight sightings for close to an hour before finally scoring Sighting #9 by the haunted mansion, a 21ish dark blonde in a tanktop walking the grounds with her boyfriend. She was modestly attractive but what set her apart was the cross tattoo on her upper back. Hot to ponder a young woman religious enough to get a cross tattoo yet still smokes.
Only a couple moments after this would come Sighting #10, my best sighting of the day. Walking towards busy Judson Avenue from the north was a cluster of two 19-20ish couples. Immediately drawing my attention was the attractive, sunglasses-donning brunette chick in the cluster, the only one smoking. And boy was she smoking. Rather than holding her cigarette at her side, she held it next to her face with a bent elbow as if she was sitting at the bar. She wore a green top and tight blue jeans that showcased her form nicely accentuated by the elbow-bent style with which she proudly held the all-white next to her pretty face. She was jubilant and bubbly as she talked to her nonsmoking friends (two guys and two girls) and when she took a drag, the windy air scattered it directly into the faces of the friends group who never complained when they got splashed in the face by their attractive friend's pollution. Things really got hot when the foursome approached the entrance of the "International Bazaar", a gathering that features live music and a cluster of international souvenir shops. Now there is no official smoking ban to my knowledge in this open air venue, but it's just assumed that nobody would be obnoxious enough to smoke there in the sensitive, prima donna culture of 2009. But this girl was obnoxious and myopic enough to do just that, marching right past the entry gate with cigarette in hand.
The highlight of the sighting came when she stood behind the seating area and was followed in by a mother and her early teen daughter who stood behind her. My girl took a nice drag from her cigarette and thoughtlessly exhaled, allowing the strong north wind to splash smoke straight directly into the faces of mother and daughter. Both of them were waving the smoke out of their faces and then walked away with disgusted looks on their faces, while my girl stood there clueless the entire time about how badly she repulsed her fellow fairgoers. She and the nonsmoking female friend would then converse with one another for the duration of her cigarette before she dropped it to the pavement and crushed it out and then got in line for a beverage. I could tell even from my relatively distant vantage point that it was a Marlboro Light Menthol. Finally, a sighting worth feeling good about.
I left the International Bazaar and within seconds stumbled into Sighting #11, a modest late 20s blonde who was also part of two couples. I didn't think much of it but when I saw the other modestly attractive plain jane late 20s gal in her cluster fishing around in her purse, I decided to stick around. I was definitely pleased that I did when instead of retrieving a cigarette she took out a Swisher Sweet little cigar. She sparked it up, becoming Sighting #12, and proceeded to carry on with a dangle that must have lasted no less than 90 seconds. Granted, I would have preferred she be a hottie rather than a plain jane, but she was still attractive enough to draw my interest dangling that smelly cigar from her lips. I followed the cluster briefly as they proceeded, always welcoming the opportunity to ingest cigar smoke exhaled from a young lady.
Next I would I wander towards the Space Tower and stumbled upon a family of smokers with two young daughters. The oldest daughter (Sighting #13) was prettier, looking about 19-20, brunette with a tight white T-shirt and jeans, with a freshly lit all-white. The younger daughter (Sighting #14) was also attractive but had a little bit more of a trashy look. The family, which included the parents and what I presume was a boyfriend, looked a little on the trashy side as a whole, so this sighting comes nowhere close to my epic family of smokers sighting from 2006, but was nonetheless a welcome event on a late morning where I finally seemed to be finding my stride.
But the sightings continued to be few and far between after that cluster of sightings. I always try to convince myself not to panic when the morning hours and early afternoon hours are unproductive, but at one point I had been at the fair for nearly four hours with only 18 sightings. Things were not going as well as I would have liked.
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