Posted by Ann on 2/25/2002, 8:01 am Neat, huh? I've discovered that I'm more creative as a non-smoker, and that I can sit through movies in the theater now, and that my lipstick wears so much better than it used to. I smell better and I smell more. My cats are friendlier and my house is cleaner, and maybe the sun is even a little brighter today. But my thoughts today are not with the quit itself. It seems to me that even though it's hard, it's do-able. You just have to teach yourself not to smoke...everywhere...during everything you ever do...anywhere...all the time. My thoughts are with the sense of accomplishment and empowerment that I get from keeping this quit. And that perhaps I should look at the quit itself as my new crutch. And throw myself into this project as a relief from all the stress. The quit will save my life. The quit is good for me. The quit is something I can be sure of. The quit is mine and no one else can have it. My 'out of control' emotions ARE what I am really feeling. Just that they come out magnified in comparison to what I am used to. And what everyone else around me is used to seeing out of me. But I don't cry 'for no reason', I cry for EVERY reason. I don't snap at people just because I'm being crabby. I'm crabby because they are irritating me. I upset people because I speak my mind. They would rather they upset me and I didn't mention it. We are taught to be polite at the expense of our own feelings. You wait till people do REALLY BAD things to you before you draw lines. You smoke to supress your feelings thinking you're doing right by keeping them to yourself. You kill yourself slowly and keep it to yourself rather than have someone accuse you of overreacting. I say $crew all that, let your emotions flow freely. Where did anyone ever get the idea they're not suppoed to show emotions? I am not an emotional wreck. I am an emotional person. As all people are by nature. I am not scared to have feelings. I do not need to smoke to hide them from others or myself. My mood is not a trigger. It is just the way I am feeling. Today I feel proud of myself and confident that I can keep this quit! Quitnet, From Dawn33
Here I am a non smoker for 50 days. I've suffered through cigarette withdrawals, international terrorism, riots in my city, nicotine patch withdrawals, my car getting hit, the problems associated with having two boyfriends both of which suck, and the weepy stage where just about anything will open the flood gates that are in my tear ducts. And still...I did not smoke.
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