Posted by nrm on 11/27/2006, 2:10 pm flop skins merlot wanted to smell the freshly showered perfume scented neck of a soul mate he had never met, to hear her cry out his name in the middle of climax, to hear her laugh in the pouring rain, to feel the soft touch of a woman’s warm fingers scratching his back while she whispers those 3 special words into his cold ear flop skins merlot had two different personalities much like dr. Jeckel and mr hyde, he spoke to no one, had no thoughts, became dead to the world at times, other times he was like an electrified kicking bronco on acid, ideas spurting from his mind like rapid fire snap shots of every artistic word or paint splatter ever created flop skins merlot would think of an idea to do, & with in a few seconds later completely cancel that from his memory & want to do the exact opposite of the original thought flop skins merlot saw himself as an ugly loner with no future & no hope, but would then think he was a creative charismatic humorous man with tons of opportunities for the future which was filled with rays of sunlit hope flop skins merlot thought the entire world was talking shit about him, plotting against him, pointing at him, laughing under their breath about him,
74.192.29.139
flop skins merlot sat out in the rain fighting with the inside of his head trying to decide to live a boring life of sobriety or to continue to have periodic moments of happiness through abuse that always just led to regret and trouble
calculating his impending doom, paranoid panic attacks came like the self destruction he tried to escape to everyday back to the see saw calm inner sanctity of spiritual enlightenment where all is conquered & all is peaceful
inner and outer
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