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Posted by Lena My point that I was trying to make (it is difficult to put my thoughts to words at work is this) - Apa may in fact be the only man she has ever trusted. That would definately change if she felt she had to perform things that she found exploitive to please him, the intimacy and trust would vanish. He may well be the only man who has not exploited her. Where does patience come in when we are talking about OS and AS. Some women never want to do that. And you overlook the fact that she was drunk and drugged. Like I said I did things in that state that I would never call intimate and was pretty disgusted with myself over and did not even realize that I was trauma bonding with the man that exploited me. So it is not a matter of her doing for him what she did for other man, my understanding is that she was not in a mindset to do so voluntarily and therefore, there was not desire to do so. Also, if Apa wants this so badly and is willing to risk the intimacy he has gain, well then I say get her drunk, drug her and have at it, but be prepared for the results afterwards.
on 10/22/2004, 7:30 pm, in reply to "I have been abused"
I do not believe I have ever heard her or Apa say she wasn't trying to get help.
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