Posted by Nancy (post) on 5/1/2008, 10:57 am
67.80.70.16
I am so overwhelmed I can't think straight. I cant cry hard or loud enough to get it out of me. I can't talk to anyone cause they just dont understand.
I completed radiation earlier this week and the next phase is hormonal theraphy. My onc went over the side effects of tamoxifen and I just shut down after hearing there was a chance of getting uterine cancer from the drug. It is a small chance but it still exists. I have finally come to realize I will never be cured. Cancer in one form or another will always be that boogey man in my closet or hiding under my bed. I have to forever be one step ahead of it, it will never be gone. This is the second type of cancer I have had. Why is it such a shock to my doctor that I don't want to hear that I will not only have to be concerned of a recurrance but now a third type of cancer can develop?
I was given the option of going on a Trial for the phase 3 evaluation of the role of ovarian function suppression and the role of exemestane adjuvant therapies for premenopausal women w/ endocrine responsive BC.
I am told to read the information provided so that I can make the decision as to my course of treatment. My decision is clear, I don't want cancer! I don't want to take anything that will give me cancer! I don't want to take anything else that will cause any of my organs to develop a new disease! Why is that so hard for the doctors to understand. I am not a specimen on the table. I have a life. I had a life...
it seems the answer to every damn thing is take another pill. I raised my questions about the other side effects of the other drugs and I was told that I will need to communicate with the doctors so that they can prescribe something to lessen or elimate the side effects. Pills, pills, pills...that is all they say. I AM SICK OF TAKING PILLS!
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR I want to scream!
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