Posted by beth on 2/22/2008, 5:58 pm
my husband of 2 years "cheated" on me with an ex g/f thru email on myspace. i caught him 2 days ago. at first i wanted nothing more than to cause him physical harm. i was so mad and angry with him. i made him leave our home telling him to not come back. then i calmed down a bit and knew that what my initial reaction was was wrong and i called him to have him come home so we could talk. well, we talked but it was mostly yelling and screaming and arguing and me hitting him more. but he didnt hit me... he left on his own this time but came back a short while later. all the time i am feeling hurt and confused and mad and everything in between. we have 2 children and i dont want him to go but in a way i dont want him to stay. i dont trust him or respect him at all right now. he says he can understand that buti dont think he fully does. i asked him, " do you want to stay together? if you do, we have to both give 100% effort into making this marriage work. there will be certain ground rules that we both must follow. i need an answer from you." he slept on it and later the next day said that he did want to stay. he tells me that he did this because he was/is unhappy here at home and was seeking happiness elsewhere. the nite before i caught him , i had asked him if there was anything going on, (gut feeling), and he bold faced lied to me. i love him more than i have ever loved anyone. we used to have something so special, so great. i want him to stay because i love him and i dont want to lose him. i dont want to breakup my family. but i cant help but continue to think of the things i read on his myspace page. he told this girl he loved her and they were planning on taking a trip and had "sex" with her. he says that it was just typing, just words. but just words are "hi hows it going, how ya been..." stuff like that. not " i cant wait to feel my hot sticky c*m on you" im just confused as to whether i follow my heart or my head...
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