Posted by Been There on 1/22/2007, 4:48 pm, in reply to "he won't admit it" I didn't want to listen to my gut. I had to listen to my children. That is when I REALLY started looking into matters. I looked at our phone bill. I noticed a phone number that looked odd. The call was placed not even 2 minutes after I left that evening. I confronted him about the number. He said it was just someone from work that he was confiding in with our marriage problems. I looked at credit card receipts... the ones I could find. I found a purchase from a gift shop in a town he wasn't suppose to be in that evening. I didn't know what it was. I confronted him on that. He said he bought me something for Christmas and forgot to give it to me. He went to the shop, and came back with a beautiful candle. I knew he didn't buy it for me. The other Christmas presents he gave me that year sucked. They were cheap and unrelating to me. I reminded him how he took the kids shopping 2 days before Christmas because he had not bought me anything yet. It took over 4 months of digging and listening to my gut before I found out about the adultery. I HAD to dig. I knew I couldn't just let it go until I knew for sure one way or the other. Take care. PS.
Our children noticed their dad's grumpy attitude. They noticed him not being 'connected' with them. Of course, we didn't know what was going on. Our 8 year old daughter told me how one night when I was gone, Dad took the phone and talked in the sunroom so they couldn't hear. Later that night he left and when our 16 year old son asked where he was going, he said to have some fun.
Kids are smart. They knew his behaviour was not normal. They told me as soon as I got home the next day. (I was gone over night to my cousin's house. My husband suggested I go and spend sometime with her. He wanted to spend time with the kids.)
After D-day, ow told me how much my husband loved me and wanted our marriage. I asked her how she would know...he never told her that. I guessed on that part but later when I asked him, he said he never told her that.
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