Posted by Alexander Nevermind on 10/13/2009, 10:10 pm
The music hit and Sgt. Hammer came out with "Legal Chimp", I mean chump, I mean Eagle( I'll get it right in a minute folks, or did I already? 
). Howard C.Cross in tow. The crowd and GCW fan Peanut gave them the thumbs down! Hammer responded by having to be restrained from beating up Peanut and several other fans at ringside( For my $, if they get into it, I got 10 on Peanut!).
THe music hit and the "One Man Swarm" the INHuman Fly shot from the back like he was blown from a cannon as the crowd got ready to strap themselves in so they could "fly the INHuman skies" for the next 20 minutes! Comissioner "Fast" Eddie Layne grabbed the stick and let Cross know that his stipulation had a "Minor" change, Cross's smug look turned into horror as he was informed that he was not going to be handcuffed to Sawyer, he was going to be handcuffed to his DOG COLLAR!The crowd erupted with the news as the music of Rob Zombie filled the room and a dog collar clad Dan Sawyer came out of the dressing room ready to "Take a bite out of Cross", I mean Crime!
At first Cross was reluctant, but the motivation/threat of stripping Hammer of the title, not to mention an impatient Sawyer who grabbed Cross's wrist and handcuffed the convict/manager himself kind of changed his tune!
The match started with WCW ZWO man Nick Patrick called for the bell. Neither man had a advantage going on until Hammer gave the Fly a reverse horse kick to the groin that swung the Pendullum in his favor. The Fly rebounded and sent the deranged Drill instructor to the canvas with a surprise reverse dropkick. Cross tried to get up on the ring apron, but the dog collar did its job as Sawyer yanked the Six Flags look alike offf the apron as the crowd went wild! Cross tried to interject himself several times as the Fly was throwing everything at Hammer but the kitchen sink,and he would have used that but he didn't have time to unscrew it from the wall! The dog collar and Sawyer dragged the manager from pillar to post as the crowd made fun of Cross's predicament. The GCW Tag Champs, The Moneymakers raced from the dressing room, JP Magnum had "Betsy Ross" in his evil clutches. They attacked Sawyer and with the help of a rejuvenated Cross, the three men with "Betsy Ross's" help, freed Cross and handcuffed Sawyer to the ring post. We were sure that WCW Senior man Nick Patrick wasn't gonna stand for that, he went over to protest, but a stack of hundreds big enough to choke a horse was produced from the pocket of Richie Rich Tutweiler III, he took the ill gotten benjamins and returned to the match where the Fly had Hammer pinned, he counted , but apparently , according to Cross's statement hurt his arm and counted only 2, the crowd was irrate as a referee and a female wrestler emerged from the dressing room in an attempt to free Sawyer. Cross tossed "Betsy Ross" to Hammer who swung and hit the INHuman Fly like Barry Bonds trying to get one more home run!Of course Patrick was still nursing his injured limb to see all of this. The injured Fly turned around and ran into a pile driver from the Sarge, Patrick recovered long enough to count 3 and give the match and the belt back to Hammer as the crowd got ready to storm the ring and put a beatdown on Patrick who had a trail of 100's following him back to the dressing room. Cross got too close to a uncuffed and ticked off Sawyer who headbutted him into the next week! He grabbed the mic and begged Layne for a tag team match between him and the Fly teaming up to take on Cross and Hammer when the GCW rolls back into Pell City on December 2, when GCW presents "Seasons Beatings"! Layne digressed and made the match as the crowd went wild!
-Alexander Nevermind/ Roving GCW reporter-
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