Posted by sweetgirl on November 7, 2009, 6:51 am
Message modified by user sweetgirl November 7, 2009, 6:59 am
Do you remember when your children, niece or nephew began their exploration of the world? Do you remember when they first started to pull themselves up on the coffee table and spent weeks there, up and down, bouncing, bending their legs, smiling. Next they started to move along the table, chubby little hand over hand, smiling. Then came the day you looked up and they moved, oh my gosh, from the coffee table to the sofa, they let go of the table and the momentum took them to the next island to explore. Their they stood, bouncing, smiling, cooing, happy. And that’s when you wanted to see if they would take a step toward you. You got down on their level, arms stretched out in front of you, smiling, reassuring, patient, wanting to touch their little fingers, to help them along, but excitingly waiting for them to do this all by themselves. And then, it happened. They took that first little baby step, scared but excited, small but sure and they left the security of the sofa behind them and towards you, excited, happy, proud and you wrapped them in your arms and hugged them, big. : )
When your child began to explore even more, he didn’t leap from one side of the room to the other, he simply walked, slowly at first, a few small baby steps. He fell a number of times, sometimes we were there to say, hop up buddy, shake it off, keep going. Sometimes we were in the other room and missed the progress completely, but he still kept going. He took those baby steps and we cheered with excitement for each one. When he stopped and swayed and locked his little knees we were sure he was going to fall but we were right there, encouraging him to take that next step, to keep going until he reached the other side of the room, elated, proud!
I think we should all be reminded that steps in our struggle are not going to be giant steps at first but rather small baby steps, small victories for ourselves that build our muscles and increase confidence in order to walk our walk. Some days we may not even leave the coffee table but just stand there, bouncing, fine, ok and managing, but most of all secure. Secure in the routines of family, work, staying busy, not alone but safe. Other days we want to explore our world, what we are feeling, someone who has touched our lives like no other and we step, baby step, toward them and toward a true authentic life for ourselves. Some days we fall. Many of you have someone their with you, clapping, encouraging you when you step, holding you when you fall. Others of you are trying to do this alone.
When our little ones began this process we applauded them for the progress they had made, we showered them with kisses and hugs and told them how proud we were of them. We actually put them back down and hoped they would do it again! We didn’t simply put them in a walker because their journey was over, no, we started to encourage them daily to keep going, keep taking these baby steps. We recognized when they were tired, we held them, we let them rest and then we encouraged them when they were ready. I think it’s important to remember that the most important thing we can do is to keep stepping. It matters not how small your steps are or how long it takes you to get to the other side of the room or if you happen to fall backwards. What matters is that you keep stepping because what you deserve is the opportunity for good things. You deserve to love fully and completely in a way that speaks to you, foundationally, honest, true. You deserve to be treated well and you deserve to have the feelings you remember alive and on the surface and not pushed down inside.
And remember how excited and proud you were to share how your little one took their first steps, started to walk, stand on their own? This is where we, here on the other side of this struggle, find ourselves. We want to share, we want to be there. We are already here, we are proud of your baby steps and we are here when you don’t feel like stepping at all and it’s ok. We want to be there when you fall, smiling, encouraging, loving you. And we will be here when you get there, and join you, one baby step at a time.
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