Posted by LC on November 6, 2009, 3:59 pm, in reply to "ccsgirl introduction:) "
Welcome, great first post.
--Previous Message--
: Hi all,
:
: I’ve been reading here for quite some time
: and posted a few times already, but haven’t
: gotten around until now to introducing
: myself. First, I want to thank all the women
: here that share so much of themselves, each
: person has added so much to my journey! JB,
: don’t mean to disregard any one else, but I
: totally love your direct style…so many of
: your postings have been like a light bulb in
: my head…can’t thank you enough
:
: I’m 39, married for 18 years (separated for
: the past 6 months), have 4 children, and
: have fully committed myself to the most
: amazingly beautiful woman. My GF and I met
: around this same time last year; she and I
: were both co owners of our own respective
: businesses located in the same shopping
: center. She is a LLL and had been with her
: partner on and off for the past 10 years.
: During the last holiday season we were both
: extremely busy with our stores and didn’t
: really get to spend much time together other
: than the occasional “hello, how’s your day”
: sort of chit chat. After the holidays were
: over and business pretty much died, we
: started spending each morning sitting in
: front of her store sipping coffee, talking,
: and getting to really know each other.
: Eventually our half hour mornings turned
: into a couple hours and then we were
: basically rushing to get our work done and
: out of the way so we could spend every spare
: minute with each other. I realized very
: quickly that I was extremely attracted to
: her, but I wasn’t really sure how she felt
: about me. Every day I would vow to spend
: less time with her, convincing myself that
: she wasn’t interested in me but just a very
: genuinely friendly person, and every day I
: would find myself sitting there totally
: absorbed in her. Finally one day I just
: admitted to her that I couldn’t come down
: and spend time with her anymore because I
: was getting too attached, figuring that she
: would say something like “I’m sorry that’s
: not how I feel about you” or something along
: that line, but to my surprise and excitement
: her exact words were “I know, me too”. The
: next day she came into my store just to talk
: about us…it was confusing, exciting,
: scary…you name the emotion and I was feeling
: it. We talked for awhile about what we both
: wanted to do about how we were feeling and
: basically decided to play it by ear; I even
: mentioned that I wouldn’t be able to do
: anything for at least another two years
: because I wanted my two oldest children out
: of school first. We look back at that
: conversation now and just laugh at how naïve
: we were in thinking that this relationship
: would have waited that long.
: That conversation was in March, we became
: intimate with each other about a month
: later, and I realized, even before the
: intimacy, that I couldn’t stay in my
: marriage. I told my h that I was in love
: with her, told him that our marriage wasn’t
: going to work, and moved out to my own place
: at the beginning of May. Gf moved in with
: me around the end of July, my daughter lives
: with me full time, the oldest boy comes to
: visit occasionally, but stays with his dad,
: and the younger two split time between my
: house and his.
:
: That’s the condensed version obviously, we
: had some very bad emotional times through
: the whole thing; he was hurt, the older
: children were hurt and upset, the younger
: two were confused, her partner was hurt, but
: through the whole thing she and I were
: falling deeper and deeper in love with each
: other. Neither of us had ideal
: relationships prior to meeting each other,
: we weren’t truly happy in our
: marriage/partnerships, nor were we exactly
: unhappy, but I had already had thoughts
: that after the youngest two were grown I
: would leave. She and her partner were almost
: always in disagreement about something, they
: were just so used to being together that
: they just stayed.
:
: Gf and I, meeting each other, it was like
: finally waking up and realizing that total
: soul-consuming love wasn’t just some myth. I
: never understood it; never really got the
: whole “I love you” thing until I met her and
: it’s just gotten better, deeper, and more
: fulfilling as time has gone on. She’s the
: only woman I’ve ever been with and it’s the
: hottest, most sexually satisfying
: relationship I’ve ever experienced in my
: life, but it goes so much farther than
: that…so much more emotional, so much more
: equal and connected. Our relationship
: started fast and yet it was never fast
: enough, it was never a question of “should I
: do this” but more of a “how can I not do
: this”; being apart from her…being with
: someone else was pure hell. We’ve talked
: about it many times; for us there has never
: been a moment of regret, never a moment of
: doubt that we belong together. My h and I
: have discussed the divorce process, but
: neither of us are financially ready as of
: yet to face it head on. He seems very happy
: lately, I work in the same office with him
: and he’s come in a few times whistling…I’m
: pretty sure he’s seeing someone now too. My
: daughter is the happiest I’ve ever seen her,
: she finally has a stable relationship with
: her dad because they aren’t always in the
: same house together; she has a great
: relationship with my gf and will talk to her
: about things that she isn’t comfortable
: discussing with mom. My oldest son seemed
: okay with my relationship with gf in the
: beginning, has pulled away from me in the
: last month or so, but he’s 18 now so he
: doesn’t really want to be around me much at
: this point anyway. My youngest two are
: totally in love with gf and she with them,
: they don’t even question why she’s there but
: they complain the loudest when she isn’t.
: My immediate family, with the exception of
: my oldest brother, has been very supportive
: of my new lifestyle, basically telling me
: that they just want me to be happy. H’s
: family has totally disowned me, and I’ve
: lost a few friends, but I’ve also accepted
: the fact that I’m responsible for my own
: happiness and I'm choosing the best way for
: me.
:
: Ccsgirl
:
:
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