Posted by xgirl on November 5, 2009, 12:37 pm, in reply to "H dating other women and my green-eyed monster"
I'm actually anxious for my ex-H to meet a girl and fall in love because he'd be so much less angry and volatile towards me if he would just move on already. BUT, the idea of another woman spending time with my children makes me sick just thinking about it. So in that regard I can totally relate.
I think couples therapy sounds like a very healthy idea for the two of you-- i wish my ex-H and I had done that because we aren't friends now and we left things rather angrily.
--Previous Message--
: I am grappling with yet another feeling and
: new situation (seriously people, which
: situation will FINALLY be the cherry on top
: and I can start eating my way through the
: sundae to the bottom??).
:
: I have nooooo desire physically for my h.
: Haven't had for years and no hope that it
: will ever be there(and question if I even
: did in the beginning). Right now, I am
: actually feeling a lot of anger towards him
: (this can be worked out as he has stepped up
: and I know I can work through anger). Every
: little thing he does irritates me this past
: month or so. Yet, I think if we worked on
: it, I could get back to the place where he
: is by far my most supportive, funny,
: fun-to-be-with, understanding friend.
:
: He has set up a few dates. I don't feel
: like I can tell him not to since I have had
: a gf and I also know I won't ever desire him
: and the thought of him physically with
: someone else is just fine by me. No issues
: with that. However, the thought of him in
: the future sitting on the porch step with a
: glass of wine talking and laughing with
: someone else makes me cringe. My little
: green-eyed monster wants to claw some eyes
: out and this is just a fictional woman at
: this point. I also can't stand the thought
: of someone else mothering my babies. How do
: I get past these feelings? I don't want
: him, but I don't want anyone else to have
: him either (ugh, I feel horrible saying
: that). I want to have my cake and eat it,
: too. . .right? How do you truly let go of a
: relationship? I think my way of doing that
: right now is to get angry and push him away,
: but I want to remain close friends with him.
: HELP! Would couples therapy help with this
: or is this something I tackle in my own
: therapy?
:
: For those of you who chose to leave your H
: even though you were emotionally very close,
: how did you do it? Are you still good
: friends? Do you ever regret leaving?
:
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