Posted by mariejune42 on November 3, 2009, 5:07 pm, in reply to "Just talking...."
Hi, Silentlyexploding
I am sorry that you are going through a difficult time right now. I commend you on going to your pastor. I am not at that point yet. My husband is extremely homophobic and does not really know that he is married to a lesbian. My H sounds a bit like yours, mine would want to know everything that my pastor too (if I were consulting with one). Best of luck. Wow, there are so many of us in this situation......married with men and kids and think women are beautiful, sexy and amazing!
--Previous Message--
: Just making chit chat, because I can't talk on
: the phone to one of my friends about all of
: this today (hubby issitting right beside me,
: so vocalizing any of this is not okay...)
:
: I am leaving in about an hour to meet with a
: pastor about me being a lesbian. He is a
: liberal(gay) pastor,and so I am hoping he
: can really help me see how me being a
: lesbian AND a Christian is okay. My husband
: and I had an argument last night, again,
: about the sin of it all, and I really want
: to understand it all better.
:
: I am very nervous that after this, my
: husband will want me to tell him every
: little thing I discussed with the pastor. I
: am sure it would lead to an argument,
: because H is not even remotely happy about
: the pastor I have chosen to talk to. But I
: also see this as a sign of me moving in the
: right direction, because a year or 2 ago, I
: would never dream of going to a pastor my
: husband doesn't approve of.
:
: I discussed my *situation* with my mom
: yesterday. She knew years ago that I was
: struggling with my sexuality, but had
: figured that I had shoved it all back in the
: closet for good. She was very supportive and
: says she would rather me sort it out now
: than to look back when I am 50 or 60 and
: wish I had been living my life with honesty
: about who I am.
:
: Today I am feeling really good about the
: decisions I am making. Progress, however
: slow, is being made. :-)
:
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