Posted by silentlyexploding on November 3, 2009, 1:07 pm
Just making chit chat, because I can't talk on the phone to one of my friends about all of this today (hubby issitting right beside me, so vocalizing any of this is not okay...)
I am leaving in about an hour to meet with a pastor about me being a lesbian. He is a liberal(gay) pastor,and so I am hoping he can really help me see how me being a lesbian AND a Christian is okay. My husband and I had an argument last night, again, about the sin of it all, and I really want to understand it all better.
I am very nervous that after this, my husband will want me to tell him every little thing I discussed with the pastor. I am sure it would lead to an argument, because H is not even remotely happy about the pastor I have chosen to talk to. But I also see this as a sign of me moving in the right direction, because a year or 2 ago, I would never dream of going to a pastor my husband doesn't approve of.
I discussed my *situation* with my mom yesterday. She knew years ago that I was struggling with my sexuality, but had figured that I had shoved it all back in the closet for good. She was very supportive and says she would rather me sort it out now than to look back when I am 50 or 60 and wish I had been living my life with honesty about who I am.
Today I am feeling really good about the decisions I am making. Progress, however slow, is being made. :-)
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